November 2002 rediagnosed with a recurring tumor I am going to bring you through the whole fun thing   Archives << current   This is where you stick random tidbits of information about yourself.

Brain Tumor History And Other Rants   Thursday, May 26, 2005   5/24/05 I have decided to do my radiation at St. Barnabas where my neuro-oncologist is and where my surgeon works out of 2 days a week. I got records from the city and Heather copied them for my NJ doctors charts. I got these at my MRI on Friday then I had another MRI here in NJ this week. So tomorrow I go in for a paper mache mask to be made of my face. You see for the radiation they need to have you exactly positioned each time. So they take this cosmic material that start off feeling like a warm towel on your face then by the time it gets cool it is hard (kind of reverse logic, going from warm to cold usually doesn’t stiffen). So this appointment is an hour and a half. Then Saturday we go to see one hall and Sunday 4 more, then I have 1 more so far for next weekend. We are down to 6 places. Thanks for the offer but no band / no dj – kind of jaded on the whole wedding music thing, and I don’t drink enough to dance anymore. 3:59 PM Monday, May 23, 2005   5/23/05 I had good dr. appointments last week so that is good both dr’s at St. Barnabas were very nice and unless this dr in Morristown knocks my socks off on Thursday, I will probably be getting treated there. I am going for another MRI for them tomorrow. I just had one on Friday, but they all like using their own machines and it bills another $2500 for them to my insurance. The money is in the treatment not in fixing you. It is weird my blood numbers have been off recently and I haven’t had any chemo in like 5 months. The radiation program they outlined for me is 6 ½ weeks. I am hoping my side effects aren’t bad. By the end of it I should be pretty worn down which I am aware of will happen. I have had 3 arm seizures in the past 2 weeks so I have a period after each of those where my arm reverts back in usefulness. My doctor increased one of my drugs a little more. Hey something one day is going to take me out I don’t know if it will be my head or the drugs. Every family has a junkie and I have that covered in my family. I know what I have done that most people refer to when they say, “I couldn’t do what you are doing.” It’s not the doctor’s, surgery, or treatment, it’s the lack of freedom and ability to get around for myself. It’s only been 5 months without driving though. My record is 18 months. In positive news, yesterday we went and looked at 7 places and found 2 possible places for our marriage. I know a lot of the venues from djing for 8 years. So I took the New Jersey wedding hall lists and narrowed them down more today. My only major request is no DJ! 4:33 PM Tuesday, May 17, 2005   5/17/05 I have 2 doctor appointments in NJ this week. One with with a radiation doctor. One with a Neuro-Oncologist. And on Friday I go to New York for an MRI at NYU. Then next week I have a second appointment with another radiation doctor. It looks like I will know next week when radiation starts probably right after memorial day weekend. 5:40 PM Wednesday, May 11, 2005   Thank you to everyone for all your great wishes for us. We are very happy right now and it is an exciting time. 10:45 AM Thursday, May 05, 2005   5/5/05 The story behind the last post. So I needed to go to NYU for 2 follow up doctor visits. Heather took the day off to take me in for the appointments. We got into the city around. 10:30 and then went and parked the truck. We went into the office hoping to get done early we brought books knowing that wouldn’t happen. It wasn’t to long for the first visit and we got that done, but while waiting for the second we got hungry. Eventually we got that visit and paperwork done. Now it’s like 3pm and we decided on a quick slice of pizza so we wouldn’t ruin dinner. So we left the city after pizza and joined ever building traffic. Sometimes I run plots in my head. So on the way home we were passing by the town that had Heather’s ring. I figured it would be done so I casually suggested we stop in and try to pick it up. No argument from her of course. So we went by and it was just being finished. We picked it up and I told Heather she wasn’t getting it right away. Truth be told I really wanted something really super, and I hadn’t thought of anything. But you see that’s the difference with Heather she has no airs about her. She is a real person, angel at heart and just wants me for me and this really meant a lot to us to declare our bond to the world so the how wasn’t as important as I was over thinking it in my mind. She is so special and important in my life. So we started driving west again and I was plotting in my head again. How do I give her this ring so it is a special moment for us. Well I figured we should at least have a dinner and eat good Chinese food so we did. Then I directed her through some side roads and got to Tourne park in Booton. I told her let’s go hiking up the mountain. I debated giving her the ring at the restaurant but it wasn’t private enough, or fancy enough. So we hiked up the mountain to the top, and we hiked and got to the overlook, looked out over hills and valleys. Then we came upon a little area that was dedicated to 9/11. I kind of felt like it took some steam out of my thoughts because for me when I think about that enough it makes me really sad and aggravated that it didn’t have to happen. But at the same point it kind of shined a little light on life saying on some level, don’t wait. The time to share life and love is now. So we started hiking back down the hill I was losing my chance but, there was one overlook we passed on the way up too. So we got to it and sat back down on a bench made from a cut tree and looked over hills and valleys again. I was busting Heathers chops I made up 5 questions and then I told her are you sure you want number 6 she had no idea. Funny side note the ring fell out of my pocket twice and she didn’t notice. So the 6th question I said to her “Will you marry me.” Her face shattered and she said yes. I put the ring on her as we both cried and hugged. We got up and floated down the rest of the mountain. She actually believed me that I wouldn’t give her the ring right away. I don’t know how she felt but holding her hand with that ring was amazing. And I found myself looking at her hand and feeling so happy and proud. Heather is so special and she said yes to me. Before we went home we stopped by her house first to tell her parents. Her mom was real happy and her father was happy to. Remember sometimes I plot things in my head. 10:50 AM Wednesday, May 04, 2005   E N G A G E D 4:03 PM