November 2002 rediagnosed with a recurring tumor I am going to bring you through the whole fun thing
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This is where you stick random tidbits of information about yourself.
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Brain Tumor History And Other Rants
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Sunday, January 16, 2005
Well I know people come here for doctor / new info on what kind of toture is prescribed to me I have 2 doctors appointments this week.
Tuesday with the radiologist to find out the doctors opinion on my busted head.
And Friday the 28th with the surgeon to get his opionion. Then I put that together with a Neuro-onc here in NYC and then double opinion it with my former Neuro-Onc who moved to UCLA to practice medicine. So real answers of what and when are probably minimum 3 weeks. Because then I have to take all that data and see what makes sense to me. Like I know anything.....
But while I have you here you will also be subject to rotten pieces of philosophy I make up borrow or steal either funny or sad.
I was talking to this older guy one day and I told him now that you know everything your body is to broken to do any of it.
I mean you know more on the 3rd year of your job than your first so why did we know so much from like ages 10-20 something? If we did we would have done it all differently I bet.
I know I would have I feel like I didn't make a difference in those years. I graduated college which I know some people that haven't are jealous of. But when I got out I just went out got a 9 to 5 job and didn't make a real difference. Except to those people addicted to music news on their favorite radio station web site.
I mean in the next town there was a young guy who graduated college and said to his father what else can I do but go defend my country and joined the Marines. I don't care if you are pro war or not, that is a guy who was grown up. He died defending his country. Remember that the next time you get pissed over frivolous luxuries we take for granted here.
I feel sometimes like when we are born our hands are stuck in the sand and every grain of sand is one of our days. Again at the time we had small hands. So everyone we let slip out will never come back. The old sayings of always say I love you to those people that you do is important. No one ever tells you when the last grain of sand will drop. Always make your final statements the most important. Yes it's times like the stuff I am about to face when you think abou these things but it shouldn't be so. All you got is right now, not tomorrow. Do right by those that matter. Do right by some strangers sometimes. Help injured troops, thank a veteran something.
Sometimes I see peoples names on park benchs or in elevators. And I think that is what we all seek immortality. And I think I want my name in an elevator or on a park bench so when people walk by they read my name and don't know why they have to. So, I went to the park and carved my name in a bench ..... just kidding. Most people work on their immortality through their children. Then you are helping create something that you hope will do good, and better than you did.
Don't forget we don't know which grain of sand is last, stop talking about doing something and do it.
10:14 PM
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